Monday, April 4, 2011

Day-Crawlers in the Mist -- part V


'Ello! 'Ello!


O.k., so now we're all caught up on my past adventures, yes? Good! Since then, I've gotten new Day-Crawler observing gear (see right insert) and it's been about a year now that I've been very quietly observing our research subjects in their natural habitats, and I do have a great deal to report! Let's start!


It seems that within the last year, due to the depletion of basic resources, the watering-holes have dramatically slimmed down in population size. And when the heard thins, the herd becomes desperate! With that, things have gone topsy-turvy, upside down, or downright backwards of sorts!!!


At several recent trips to a trendy, and migratory Day-Crawler watering-hole I observed, with much astonishment, that young, nubile, and so-called attractive females were allowing themselves to be approached and wooed by a seemingly inferior caliber of males that have passed their prime years ago! I hunker down and watch as I am undetected by my black Goth attire camouflaging me against a small black wall at the edge of the watering-hole...
At first I tried to claim this particular and praised vantage point by the black wall, but was rudely shoved aside by two such older males as they grunted ahead of me...practically dragging their knuckles on the ground! I responded with a slightly menacing remark to, like them, establish a sort of dominant stance...but I then quickly stepped back and gave way to observe...it is not my role to interact with these "creatures of the day."
  
Allow me a brief moment to describe these two aged alpha-males:
  • SPECIMEN #1 -- Age: Late 50's to mid 60's. Height: 5 foot 7 inches. Balding. Clad in a sports jacket over a fluffy turtleneck sweater & slacks. Adorned with gold jewelry. We shall call him "Vinny."
  • SPECIMEN #2 -- Age: Early 60's. Height: 6 foot 1 inches. Heavy-set. Slow witted. Clad in a business suit with an open collared shirt, no necktie. Glazed over look in his eyes, and is clearly what most Goth scientists would call a "Lummox." We shall name him "Po-Po."
  
From the start Vinny and Po-Po were clearly on the hunt for some easy females to prey upon. Their testosterone levels (even though depleted from age) were at their peak. They scanned the entire watering-hole for some vulnerable victims...their nostrils flaring unconsciously in attempt to pick up on a scent of pheromones. Then, after some trial and error they pounced on two unsuspecting younglings.
  
Vinny approaches the two "Does" first, from the side flank. Quickly following behind is the staggering Po-Po...grinning stupidly to himself at the potential sexual conquest that awaits him. All four engage in the usual banter and mundane pleasantries peppered with false compliments and outright untruths. The Does are clearly thirty years the males' junior, but, even though they are apprehensive, they are curious! "Might these males possess wealth, stability, and social standing for us?" They think to themselves as they give each other acknowledging glances and facial expressions. Probably the males do possess these eye-catching attributes...but more than likely they are only searching to fulfill an instant sexual gratification...what I have heard referred to during my travels as a "whambam-thankewmam!" Such strange language indeed!
  
My two specimens are clearly playing, what I call, the percentage game! Simply put, this is when a Day-Crawler male will start from one end of the watering-hole to the other making contact, any type of contact, with every female along the line (those whom are not guarded by another male’s “cocbloc” protective stance, mind you) in effort to mate with them. If the male is swiftly rejected, no problem…he confidently moves onto the next. No loss on his part! His hopes are that from the myriad of females found within the confined area, at least one will be interested in his advances. Think of it this way: there is a room full of 100 women. A man asks each of them to have sex with him. 99 percent of the women will reject the man without batting an eyelash, but if there is one woman (maybe libations impairs her judgment and inhibitions) and she is willing to do so…that’s a meager 1% return…and guess what? That is all that is needed for this predator…only 1%...FASCINATING!!!
  
So…Vinny and Po-Po are trying to impress these two young females with their worldly and experienced banter, but I can’t imagine that any of them have anything in common (think: Wheel of Fortune vs. American Idol…don’t ask me what that means…I have no idea!). They are persistent, however, the two girls now seem a bit annoyed; maybe realizing that the two men, whom are older than their fathers, are trying too hard to get them out of their knickers! 
But Lo! What’s this??? The two young girls abruptly pack up and migrate away! Vinny and Po-Po are left to themselves and somewhat disappointed but they quickly shrug it off and recover to stalk about the watering-hole, this time in separate directions…a sort of “divide and conquer” sort of tactic. Vinny takes the far end of the area, and Po-Po is left clopping about, trying to figure out his wherabouts, at the near end. Soon enough, and quite to my astonishment, both specimen have found two new females to interact with…but wait…something is different…something is amiss with the situation before me!
 
Suddenly, just as my field research was at the apex of interest to me, my attention riveted, a group of foreign Day-Crawlers spot me and insist on taking photos of me posing with their friends…Who was on Safari here, I pondered! I tried to fend them off with no avail, so I relinquish to their demands as to get it over with as soon as possible. Once that ordeal was done I return my focus on Vinny and Po-Po. Again, both older Alpha-males were making stupendous progress with their respective prospects. But how could this be?  Unexpectedly, both Vinny and Po-Po escort these females to the elevators for their rooms, each sporting a hyena’s grin from ear to ear. I am left dumbfounded. This was not the norm! This was illogical! These two women were somehow too attractive and all too willing for these older males to conquer so swiftly. My mind scrambled over a thousand theories as to why and how! Then…it hit me!!! These two females were not some random wanderers around the watering-hole…oh, no, no, my friends! They were (as I now learned) known as “Gators,” who will gladly lure in unsuspecting and lustful males into sexual interactions in return for monetary compensation! BLIMEY!!!
 
And that will be the next topic in our Day-Crawlers in the Mist series wherein I will attempt to make actual contact with one or more of these ferocious Gators! Stay tuned to see if I survive…or fall prey to their deceptive ways myself!!!

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